20081129, 18:06
*breathes in*
i know i shouldnt
i know i cant
i just dont wanna lie to myself anymore
but its just so fuckin hard
whenever i think of you
it takes everything i have to hold myself together, not to break down in front of everyone
i smile, i laugh, i act as if nothing has happened
i seem fine on the surface
but really.. its like im stuck in my worst nightmare
one i dont think i'll be able to wake up from
i knew smth was up
but i didnt wanna say anything
looking back
if i did
would it have saved me all this
fuck luh
i feel like walking in the path of a speeding car
then i dont have to think bout anything anymore
that'll be kinda nice
20081121, 23:44
you told me to trust you, that i wont get hurt again. and i did. cant believe i was stupid enough to do so.
20081113, 18:02
grabbed from sy (:
A real Boyfriend:
when she walks away from you mad
- follow her
when she stares at your mouth
- kiss her
when she pushes you or hits you
- grab her and don’t let go
when she starts cursing at you
- kiss her and tell her you love her
when she's quiet
- ask her what’s wrong
when she ignores you
- give her your attention
when she pulls away
- pull her back
when you see her at her worst
- tell her she's beautiful
when you see her start crying
- just hold her and don’t say a word
when you see her walking
- sneak up and hug her waist from behind
when she's scared
- protect her
when she lays her head on your shoulder
- tilt her head up and kiss her
when she steals your favorite hat/shirt
- let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
when she teases you
- tease her back and make her laugh
when she doesn’t answer for a long time
- reassure her that everything is okay
when she looks at you with doubt
- reassure her and back yourself up
when she says that she loves you
- she really does, more than you can comprehend
when she bumps into you
- bump into her back and make her laugh
when she tells you a secret
- keep it safe and untold
when she looks at you in your eyes
- don’t look away until she does
when she says she misses you
- she's hurting inside
when you break her heart
- the pain never really goes away
when she says it’s over
- she still wants you to be hers
when she's mad
- hug her tight and don't let go
when she says she's okay
- don’t believe it, talk with her
10 yrs later she'll remember you
- kissed her in the pouring rain
- called her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
- called her before you sleep and after you woke up
- treated her like she means the world to you
- stayed up all night with her when she was sick
- watched her favorite movie/show with her even if you think it’s stupid
- gave her the world
- hung out with her when she was bored or sad
- let her know she was important
but.. i dont want anything to change just yet (:
Labels: iloveyou, you and you
20081105, 16:20
moral of the story: spreading the wrong info can lead to a LOT of misunderstandings (: